Zaf's 9 memories of Baha'i Pilgrimage

These are 9 memories of my pilgrimage in Haifa in June 2022, in no particular order:

Standing outside the Haifa Pilgrim House walking towards the Shrine of the Bab on Day 1

1. The 3 Shrines in alignment 

When I first came on pilgrimage in 2005, the back rooms of the Shrine of the Bab were not accessible to pilgrims because they were store rooms. Now all 3 back rooms have been opened up for prayers. As I stood for the first time in the central back room of the Shrine, a revelation hit me. I wanted to face the Qiblih to say my long obligatory prayer and I realised that right in front of my line of sight was the central room holding the remains of the Bab, then directly infront of that room was the front central room holding the remains of Abdu'l-Baha, then out over the bay of Haifa directly in my line of alignment was the Shrine of Baha'u'llah! I realised that this single point I was standing was the only place on the entire planet where someone could look at all 3 sacred shrines at once! I was the closest person in time and place on the entire planet that any other human being could be to all 3 central figures of the Faith. What also struck me was that in two years time when the shrine of Abdu'l-Baha is completed and his remains are moved from the Shrine of the Bab, then it will never ever be possible again to have all 3 Shrines in a straight line like they are at this exact moment. As I lay my head on the sacred threshold on that first day of pilgrimage, I was filled with an immense wave of emotion and gratitude with streams of joyful tears flowing from my face. I will forever hold that moment as a gift that I will treasure for the rest of my mortal life. This memory is still so fresh in my mind that I am brought to tears just writing this. 

The lower central room, with the door Bab-i-Maxwell, is my favourite room in the Shrine

2. Socks of roses 

I remember coming home from the Shrine of the Bab on my first day and smelling my socks to see if I could wear them a second day. Since we are travelling light, I only had 5 pairs of socks and all of them were in the laundry. To my surprise, my socks smelled of beautiful rose petals. I even got Zavian to check because he has the most acute nostrils, and even he agreed that my socks were fragrant roses. I can only guess that it was because in the shrine you take off your shoes and the entire room smells of rose water, some of which was absorbed by my socks. This reminds me of a quote about pilgrimage that was shared during the pilgrim talk by counsellor Gloria Javid from the Greatest Holy Leaf:

"Praise be to God that through His gracious bounty you were enabled to visit His exalted, His sacred and luminous Threshold, to refresh and perfume your nostrils with the sweet-scented fragrances of God diffused from these imperishable, holy Places." 

Short video I took standing to the side of the Shrine of the Bab at sunset. A crow flew by that reminded me of my dear spiritual brother and mentor, Wagan Guburu, who's animal totem was the Crow. He told me before he died that if I saw a crow come close, then it was him coming to visit me.

3. Temple site Mount Carmel

I remember the afternoon we climbed the top of Mount Carmel after riding a bus down Tchernecovsky street to visit the Temple land. Omid and his family Niky, Nura, Nabil and Nava joined us. Along with youth year of service 22 year old Fabiano from Angolla. We stood looking out over the bay. There was a light cool breeze and the kids read a paragraph each of the tablet of Carmel. Then we sung the song "Queen of Carmel". The simplicity of the gardens and the rugged terrain seemed to be the outer form of a future glorious super structure. I felt the feeling that in the future this spot will be recreated to be a huge House of Worship with axillary buildings such as schools, hospitals and orphanages.

Boys in the tree overlooking Haifa bay from the Temple land

4. Talk by Juan Mora about teaching 

The pilgrim talk by House of Justice member Juan Mora was wonderful. He was lively, engaging, used PowerPoint with a crazy spotlight pointer, was relatable and used humour effectively. He came across as humble yet confident, down to earth yet had a sense of authority, funny yet reverent. He spoke about the qualities of an effective teacher, changing our definition of receptivity and how to overcome our fear of rejection when sharing the Faith. "Do not belittle anyone and say you know not. Speak as if we are investigating the truth. Teacher not consider himself learned. This breedeth pride, and pride is not conducive to influence." Made me think about my lecturing style at JCU and how to lecture with these sentiments at heart.

Mr Juan Mora, member of the Universal House of Justice, standing on far right

5. New connection with Shoghi Effendi 

Before pilgrimage I believed the Guardian was someone I could not really relate to on a personal level. When I read his writings, it was a real struggle to understand his complex English grammar, vocabulary and writing style that he used. I believed that he always spoke and wrote like that. 

There were two moments on pilgrimage that I felt a real awakening in my connection with the Guardian. 

First was when we went to the archives and I saw his handwriting on a note pad of a draft for his book "God passes by". He used pencil and a yellow pad paper. On one page he had written 7 words on one line of the paper and 4 of the words had been crossed out. There were arrows with extra words inserted above the line and sometimes in the margins. I came to realize that although the Guardian wrote and translated the writings, he had to work so hard and tirelessly to get the work done. Up until that moment, I had not realized how much sweat and tears the Guardian must have put into his writing. 

Writing of Shoghi Effendi from https://www.bahai.org/shoghi-effendi/guidance-translations/

The second moment was in the house of the Master and Monib shared the story of how the Guardian felt after Abdu'l-Baha died:

"I didn't want to be the guardian, I did not think I was worthy, I knew that my life as a human being was over, I did not want to face it, so I went to the Swiss mountains and fought with myself and conquered myself, then I became the Guardian. Every Baha'i needs to do the same thing, whether you are a pioneer, an administrator, every Bahai must fight with himself and conquer himself, then he becomes a true instrument for the service of the cause of God. He will not be able to give true service until every Bahai has done this." From a talk by Mr Ionis Hand of the Cause 1930.

Seeing Shoghi Effendi's handwriting in pencil with the words crossed out and hearing the real struggles he had, gave me a glimpse at the challenges and heart-felt anguish he must have experienced with the weighty responsibility of being the Guardian of the Faith. I came to see a human side of him I had never felt before. I felt really sorry for him, yet amazed at his courage and perseverence despite his human attributes. I now see him as a human being that has risen above extra ordinary circumstances to achieve greatness in servitude. Very inspiring. 

6. Story of Samandari

During the pilgrim talk by counsellor Gloria Javid, she shared a story about Hand of the Cause Mr Tarazu'llah Samandari. I was absolutely blown away by the lived experiences of this man. She shared how when he was 16 years old he met Baha'u'llah and his hands were trembling so much he could not drink his tea. Then how he later served Abdu'l-Baha, then served Shoghi Effendi. Then amazingly he was able to meet the first Universal House of Justice in 1963 before he passed away in 1986. I could not believe that there was a person in this world that met all these central figures in the Faith. I was able to visit his grave at the Baha'i cemetery and say some prayers for his soul. His life made me realize how recent these events occured in history and how blessed I am to have met three of the Hands of the Cause Ruhiyyih Khanum when I was 5 years old, Collis Featherstone when I was 7 years old, Dr Varqa when I was 24 years old. I am blessed to have also  met 4 knights of Baha'u'llah Violet Hoenke, Lillian Ali, Gertrude and Alvin Blum. In the future people will look back at this time when the Knights of Baha'u'llah and Hands of the Cause we're still alive. 

Mr Samandari, Hand of the Cause

7. Fragrance of the threshold

Another emotional memory I will treasure is the very last words of counsellor Gloria Javid's pilgrim talk. She said in a very quite and intimate tone of voice:

"Have you felt the fragrance of the roses in your hair and face as you rest your head on the sacred threshold? When you go home, you can close your eyes and you will be able to smell the fragrance of the roses." 

If I was not in a room of 100 people I would have sobbed loudly like a baby at that moment, but I sucked my tears back into my lacrimal ducts and held it together... barely.

At the holiest place on earth with my beloved "helpmate through all the worlds of God"

8. At the threshold with my kids

I remember the fourth day going to the Shrine  of the Bab and it was late afternoon and both Zorion and Zavi were at my side. All 3 of us went to the threshold of the Bab together and at the same time lay our heads down in submission. I remember feeling such gratitude for having two sons that I could share this wondrous gift and bounty with.

Then I remember on the last day walking down the white pebble stone path to the shrine of Bahji with tears in my eyes and half closing my eyes with blurry vision as I looked through my tears. I remember stepping up to the sacred threshold and Cora surprised me by coming up right beside me to hold my hand. As we both lay our heads on the threshold, while holding Cora's hand I had a wave of emotion and a feeling of immense gratitude to Baha'u'llah for giving me such a daughter as a gift. This moment made me remember some song lyrics by Ed Kawalski "I don't need no one, to tell me about Heaven. I look at my daughter, and I believe". I know there is a loving Creator that loves me, my daughter praying beside me holding my hand is my proof.

The day Cora and I walked together to the Shrine of Baha'u'llah

9. Old man shoes

The second memory of this post was about socks. Now I will end by writing about shoes. I will forever treasure the memory of walking back from the Shrine of Baha'u'llah barefoot along the white pebble stone path through Collins Gate at midday trying to catch the 12.30pm bus back to Haifa. I will never forget the pain from walking on the sharp, jagged red clay fragments on the footpath from behind the Shrine at the Bahji Pilgrim House. The pain was raw and sharp, not just from the jagged clay but also from the summer midday heat.

Why was I barefoot? Because when I came out of the Shrine of Baha'u'llah on my last day, my shoes had been taken! 

When I entered the Shrine of Baha'u'llah to say farewell on my last day, I did not know I would be saying farewell to my shoes also. I placed my shoes outside with my umbrella, and after 20mins of saying prayers I came back outside and my umbrella was there but my shoes were not! I walked back to the Bahji Visitors centre where they announced over the loud speakers for everyone to check if they had the right shoes. No response. Later that afternoon at the Haifa Pilgrim Reception Centre I saw an old Persian man about 90 years old walking to the elevator with a stick wearing my shoes. I approached him saying "Allah'u'abha, I think you have my shoes". The old man said "Oh, I thought they did not feel right". But his son asked "where are my father's shoes?!". I said I did not know but can I have my shoes back?. The son said no because then his elderly dad would have no shoes to go home in the taxi. So they took my shoes and I got his number to co tact once I found the other shoes. They had a flight to the USA the next day at 6am.

So I spoke to Monib our pilgrim guide and he showed me the loan cupboard where I found some old brown shoes that I could wear. The sole of the shoe was hanging off and would make a clapping noise every step I took. I used the string from my name badge and a rubber band to hold it in place.

Battered shoes I borrowed from the Haifa Pilgrim Reception Centre that needed to be held together with a rubber band

At 7pm during the pilgrim farewell at the Shrine of the Bab I got a message from the pilgrim reception centre that they had found some shoes. I collected them and sent a photo to the old man's son who had my shoes. I was relieved that I had the shoes and we could make a swap. The son replied to my WhatsApp message saying "those are not my father's shoes!".

At 11pm just before the pilgrim centre was closing, I got another message saying they found a second pair of shoes. So I walked back to the PRC from our apartment and the security guard handed me the shoes at 11.30pm. By this time the son was not responding to my WhatsApp messages but I knew from Omid that they were staying at the Dan Carmel hotel. So I decided to walk the 2 km up the hill from the PRC at midnight using my clip-clop broken brown shoes to drop off the old man's shoes at the hotel reception. 

At 1am I got to the hotel of the old man, left his shoes with the hotel reception and sent a WhatsApp message to the son to read when he woke up, basically saying if he could leave my shoes at the front reception and take his dad's shoes.

At 7am the next day I got a message from the son saying thank you for the shoes but they forgot to leave my shoes behind because they were in a rush.

So I have no shoes, but at least the old 90 year old man has his shoes back and a spare pair if he needs it!

This experience of walking with no shoes (then using a broken, brown, uncomfortable pair of shoes) has helped me have a glimpse of perhaps what other pilgrims may have experienced back in the day walking long distances by foot to see the Blessed Beauty.

I asked myself what Abdu'l-Baha might have done in this situation? Probably he would have also given away his rose scented socks too.